You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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