Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do

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(856): View more from New Jersey

my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face

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(541): View more from Oregon

You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.

(978): View more from Massachusetts

u sound so gay right now

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(416): View more from Toronto

He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ

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(740): View more from Ohio

Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross

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(425): View more from Washington

Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do

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