i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
