you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
