You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
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