he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize