So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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