The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words: blizzard sex
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize