Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
