Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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