We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
sex in a hospital.. check
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
