Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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