It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
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You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
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I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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