you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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