I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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