I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
