I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize