My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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