I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize