Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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