I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
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Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
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My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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