I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
