Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I think a kid would responsible me up
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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