Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
