How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
