Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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