Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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