Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
