no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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