There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize