its not stalking. its research.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
