Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Randomize
