I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
