I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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