Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize