just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
