Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize