fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
