is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I CAN MOONWALK!
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
