I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
