I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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