Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
