i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize