Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
