Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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