There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
