They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
why is half of my head shaved?
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