We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
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