Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Let's paint friendship bongs
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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