Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
